Two incidents in recent days, an ugly fan taunt to Jarren Duran and a prank call to NFL draft prospect Shedeur Sanders, crossed the line of acceptable behavior in sports. Rooted in cruelty, soaked in schadenfreude, and serving no discernible purpose other than to make someone feel bad about themselves, they deserve to be called out.
So much meanness. Make it stop.
At its best, the experience of watching sports brings us opportunities to experience joy, to unleash celebration, to ride the highs and lows of competition as if we were out there ourselves. It’s the world’s best invention for escapism, from in-person attendance to living room TV marathons, the tension of a nerve-jangling Game 7 to the drama of a days-long draft, whether on our own or as a shared experience, sports remains the best reality show of them all.
Until it turns too ugly, and the joy evaporates, as we witnessed over the weekend.
This is not to be a Pollyanna living in a fantasy world of flowers and rainbows. Sports have always been valuable as a repository for the devil on our shoulders, a dumping ground for anger and frustration when teams, players, or referees fail to do what we want. Booing a bad performance, debating a questionable trade, complaining about high prices, all of them are acceptable parts of the sporting discourse.
Unlike what we saw with Duran and Sanders.
Start with Duran, who was so beautifully brave in revealing the mental health struggles that almost ended his life, telling the world of a suicide attempt at a low point in his 2022 season. For all the positivity that came out as a result, the support of family, friends, and fans at Fenway, some idiot in Cleveland decided to use it against the 28-year-old outfielder, yelling from a seat near the visitors’ dugout that Duran should have killed himself.
Shame on that fan. Here’s hoping he never experiences the depths of despair that consumed Duran, that he never feels targeted the way Duran described in the episode of the recent Netflix documentary that was titled, “Still Alive.”
“I feel like people see us as zoo animals sometimes,” he said. “We’re like in this big old cage, people are trying to throw popcorn at you, get a picture with you, get your attention, scream your name. Sometimes some fans take it too seriously. I feel like they cross the line when they start talking about my mental health and start making fun of me for that. Calling me weak.”
Weak? What Duran did took tremendous strength. The conversation since his revelation has, thankfully, mostly reinforced the importance of treating mental health injuries with as much seriousness as we do physical ones.
“The whole purpose of me sharing was to kind of get it out there and let people know that they’re not alone,” Duran told reporters after the episode initially aired. “If I can help just one person, it’s meaningful. I’m just trying to let people know that there’s always hope and to make sure they’re reaching out.”
There isn’t as important a life lesson in what happened to Sanders, whose freefall in the draft became the hottest topic of the weekend. But I just couldn’t shake the feeling of sadness over the decision by two young men, including 21-year-old Jax Ulbrich, the son of Falcons defensive coordinator Jeff Ulbrich, to make that call and then laugh so uncontrollably at how they were able to dupe Sanders into believing they were the Saints calling to tell him they were about to draft him.
It felt like the cruelty was the point. Or maybe it was the internet fame. Or maybe it was just a reflection of where we’ve landed as a society. Do something mean, get caught, apologize, ask for forgiveness.
Using social media to address Sanders and describe what he did (including taking the private cellphone number from off his father’s iPad) as a “tremendous mistake,” Jax admitted, “what I did was completely inexcusable, embarrassing, and shameful. I’m so sorry I took away from your moment, it was selfish and childish.”
Whatever the reasons for Sanders’s draft fall, with multiple reports of a poor showing in one-on-one team interviews, the 23-year-old quarterback handled this potential embarrassment well. Speaking to reporters after eventually getting selected in the fifth round by the Browns, Sanders, who knows plenty about rubbing people the wrong way with his own brashness and confidence, brushed off what Ulbrich did.
“It didn’t really have no impact on me because it was just like, OK. I don’t feed into negativity or I don’t feed into that stuff,” Sanders said. “. . . Of course, it’s childish, of course I feel like it was a childish act, but everybody do childish things here and there.”
Duran, who had to be held back from the fan at the moment, said afterward: “When you open yourself up like that, you’re also opening yourself up to the enemies. But I have a good support staff around me — teammates, coaches, and fans — that were supporting me. So that was awesome.”
The NFL said it continues to investigate its breach and the Guardians ejected the fan from the ballpark. Small steps to incidents that we only wish never happened.
Tara Sullivan is a Globe columnist. She can be reached at [email protected]. Follow her @Globe_Tara.
